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Play With Your Kids
Author: Mark Brandenburg
As my son came running around the corner of the house, I sprang out at him as I gave a wild, primitive yell. He hit the ground quickly, trying to avoid my grasp. I reached down and tagged him as the burden of being "it" was transferred once again.
As I searched for a new hiding place in front of the house, my wife called from the front door. "Mark, it's eight o'clock, the kids have to come in!" I was a bit dumbfounded. We'd been playing tag for two hours!
In those two hours, I'd been unaware of time. There were no worries about projects at work, what time the kids needed to go to bed, or whether we had enough money to last the month. My focus had been solely on them and our task of playing tag. In those two hours, nothing else mattered.
Being in a complete state of play is one of the greatest gifts our children can give us. It is one of the ways we allow our children to transform us. It is at moments like these that our true joy and passion can come alive, and our children's, too.
When we put our "adult worries" aside we are transformed. When we apply creative energy to our relationship with our children, when we enter this state of playfulness with our children, we've entered their world in a way they'll remember the rest of their lives.
For many years, athletes have trained to find the optimal performance state called "the zone." When athletes are in the zone, they perform at their highest levels, and feel a sense of joy and positive energy. This same performance state can be found during your interactions with your children. And when it is, your relationships will reach a higher level.
Here are some guidelines to reach a higher level of play with your kids:
Clear Your Head
Drop all thoughts of work, forget about financial worries, leave the deadlines at your office. Before you see your children, clear your mind. Exercise, meditate, or use some other technique to allow your full presence to be with your children.Let Them Set The Rules
Children enjoy having their parents learn from them so let them call the shots during your playtime. Allow them to set up the rules and don't question them—unless it's dangerous. If you have a need to control things, swallow your urge for control and be ready to listen and learn.Check The 'Tude
Do a full body scan before engaging in activity with your children. Just like athletes, parents need to determine if they're ready for optimal performance. Are you wearing the right clothes so that you can fully engage in the activity? Is your attitude positive or are you feeling angry and agitated? Take steps necessary to ready yourself for play.Make Time
Aside from clearing your schedule for play, you may need to clear some time on your children's schedules. Make sure they have time for play by taking a close look at their schedules. Do you need to say "no" to some of their extra-curricular activities to make room for "daddy and me" time? Have the courage to take strong action.Ensure No Interruptions
Put structures in place to ensure your work and home life are separate. Take your work phone off the hook and avoid sneaking down to the computer when you are in the middle of playtime with your kids. Be present.
Isn't it time we started learning how to be playful again?
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