Don't Overload Your Readers With Description for Fiction Writers

Author: Kathleen Fuller

One of the most difficult elements of fiction writing is penning effective description. Too little description disorients readers, too much description bores them. Description can be looked at as the seasoning that flavors a story, and good writers are cognizant of how to use description to their advantage. As with most subjective undertakings, what is considered too much or too little is in the eye of the reader, but there are a few guidelines writers should follow when incorporating description into their stories.

Description serves several purposes. It orients the reader to the setting of the scene, such as time and place. It draws readers further into the world of the story by allowing them to experience it through sensory detail. It also paints a more vivid picture of the characters and their surroundings, which in turn brings the plot to life.

One way to subtly add description is to integrate it with other elements, such as action and dialogue. “It’s critical to remember that two characters looking at the same scene will see it differently, especially if they are male/female,” says Tamera Alexander, author of the best-selling Fountain Creek Chronicles series. “The descriptions should match the POV (point of view) character, and should serve to reveal more about that character as it’s also revealing more about the surroundings.”

In addition to incorporating description through action and dialogue, a valuable tool in the fiction writer’s tool chest is the use of the five senses—smell, taste, touch, sight, and sound. When writing description, include at least two or three of those senses into the scene. Compare and contrast the two examples below. The first example leaves out sensory details, the second weaves them in. Notice how the second passage draws the reader deeper into the character’s POV.

Michael looked at her. She had on a dress and shoes. She walked toward him. “Hi,” she said. “Sorry I’m late.”

Michael looked at her as she walked into the darkened restaurant. She’d dressed up for their date by wearing a light purple blouse and skirt. The hem swirled around her knees. He took particular notice of her high-heeled shoes, which made her seem taller than he remembered. She strode toward him, and he caught the sweet scent of her perfume. “Hi,” she said in her usual shy tone. “Sorry I’m late.”

Another way to work in the perfect amount of description is to realize that readers only need a taste of what and how the characters are experiencing their surroundings. “Let their imagination fill in the details,” advises Tyndale author Maureen Lang. “Setting can and perhaps should be an important element in fiction, but I tend to think readers today want what’s relative to the story and the rest left out.”

The most important thing to remember when writing description is not to deliver it in big chunks. There’s nothing more tedious than reading a paragraph filled with adjectives and adverbs. Break up short descriptive passages with dialogue that gives insight to the characters’ feelings and motivations, or with a few sentences of a character’s internal thought.

By following these simple tips for writing description—using point of view, the five senses, and keeping descriptive passages brief—you can craft a story that your readers will enjoy.